October Fool's Day--Ch. 1

Summary: Arthur (a.k.a. the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland) wants to get back at Alfred (a.k.a. America) for his Halloween prank last year, so he gets some extra help from a Welsh white witch. Her magic never fails, so he's guaranteed success with no problems, right? Uh-huh. Sure... Full of fluff and hilarity w/UK X fem!US.

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Step 1: Find a Witch

Arthur was lost. The streets of Wales always confused him because he couldn't read some of the local street signs. Arthur Kirkland, a.k.a. the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, had never bothered to learn the language of his older brother, Wales, out of spite, and now he was regretting it. Asking someone for directions didn't help either because of that bloody Welsh accent. I know that's English, but I can't understand a bloody thing this person is saying, he'd find himself thinking every time someone gave him directions.

"Och. Gregory. I wish we didna have to visit your cousin every year," a woman said off to Arthur's left. "Why canna he come up to Glasgow once 'n a while?"

Arthur glanced over and saw a middle-aged couple walking out of a restaurant.

"Because he dunna have a car, Alison," Gregory replied. "I tell ya this every year an' every year ya seem to forget!"

"He could take the train," Alison suggested.

These Scots were actually a little easier to understand than most, so Arthur decided to risk it. "Excuse me," he said, approaching them. "Could you tell me where I could find this address?" He handed the man the paper with the address on it.

Gregory glanced at the writing on the slip of paper. "Aye, I can tell ya where it is, but I dunna advise goin' there," he said. "Everyone who goes to that place gets cursed by a witch."

Alison elbowed him. "Dunna listen to what my silly husband's sayin'," she said with a laugh. "The things this man and his cousin are always makin' up. Nuthin' but stories about witches, ghosts, Fae, and all sorts. You'd swear the hills were crawlin' with them."

Arthur smiled apprehensively. If she only knew the truth.

"I'm not makin' up stories, woman!" Gregory said. "My cousin's sister's friend's step-brother was cursed by that witch."

"Aye, truly a reliable source," Alison said, rolling her eyes at her husband.

Arthur bit his lip to keep from laughing.

She grabbed the slip of paper from Gregory and scanned it. "Listen lad, all you have to do is go down this street and then make a left, then a right, and then a left," she said. "Then it's just around the corner from there."

"Laddie, if ya know what's good for ya, avoid that place," Gregory said, clapping a hand on Arthur's shoulder.

"Tush!" Alison said. "If there was a witch cursin' people, they probably deserved it." She started to drag Gregory away. "Honestly. Scarin' the poor lad with stories!"

Arthur actually hoped there was a witch at the address. His spells hadn't been working lately as well as they should, and every time he'd tried to curse someone, Alfred (also known as America) or France had interrupted, or Russia had appeared. Only a couple days were left until Halloween, and he just couldn't seem to concentrate; Alfred had beat him in their annual "scare-off" last year, and he needed something that would turn him into whimpering crybaby.

Last year, Alfred had nearly scared Arthur to death, wasting all of his research. Dressing as a vampire had been out; the vampire movies that had come from America were either "Mad Max"-ish, or they sparkled and induced screaming riots among his country's teens that rivaled any rock star concert.

As far as Arthur could tell, the things that scared America the most were ghosts (as usual) and zombies. Since he hadn't felt like he could pull off looking like a believable ghost, he had hired professional make-up artists to zombify him, then he'd sneaked into Alfred's house Halloween night.

All the lights were off and Arthur heard a scary movie playing in the study. The only light in the house came from glowing black and orange candles that were all over the house. To set the mood? Arthur guessed to himself.

He peeked into the study just in time to see some masked maniac or murderer on the screen chasing some screaming victims with what looked like a . . . water pipe and faucet? Why does that seem familiar? Where is Alfred anyway? Arthur wondered when he heard something in the kitchen. His eyes had finally adjusted to the candlelight, so he decided to not turn on any lights. It would add to the fear factor when he scared Alfred.

He wandered down the hall and peeked into the kitchen. Alfred was making himself a midnight snack. Does he wear that bomber jacket everywhere? Arthur thought. Oh, right. I forgot what a pig he can be. He shrugged and walked quietly up to Alfred, laying his hand limply on his shoulder "like a zombie" to get his attention.

America turned around, and Arthur found himself face-to-face with a bespectacled Russia. He nearly choked on his fake zombie teeth when he screamed and reeled back away from the larger nation.

"What the bloody hell?" he finally managed to choke out.

"Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha! You shoulda seen your face just now!" Alfred said as he came out from hiding. He still had on his glasses, which he'd nicknamed Texas for his own personal, probably nonsensical reasoning (Russia's must have been fake). He laughed and grinned. "In fact, let me show you." He pushed a button on the camcorder he was holding and played back on the little screen a video of Arthur stumbling over himself to get away from Russia, screaming, then choking, then coughing.

"You recorded that?" Arthur said.

"Hafta. Gotta prove I got you this year," Alfred said. He stared at Arthur. "Gotta admit, though, if I hadn't seen you sneaking up the walk, that costume woulda totally freaked me out. Forget ghosts, zombies really terrify me right now."

"You will give me copies, da?" Russia said, biting into the sandwich he'd made.

"Of course! That was our deal," America replied, "and thanks for helping me make that movie to set-up the mood for Artie."

Russia smiled.

Arthur scowled. "Give me that bloody camera!" he shouted as he lunged at the device, but Alfred kept it out of his reach.

"Quick Russia, upload the video to my computer!" He had tossed the camera to Russia who had quickly run upstairs and locked the door to Alfred's "computer room". No amount of shouting or threats had retrieved the camera or convinced Alfred to delete the video.

As far as Arthur could tell, the video hadn't shown up on any of the video streaming websites yet, but Alfred liked to tease that he was going to share it any day now. He needed to get Alfred good this year, or he'd have to live with that blackmail video for decades. He cringed when he thought of any other nations seeing it, especially France; it was already bad enough that Russia had a copy of it.

Yes. This year needs to be spectacularly scary and public, Arthur thought as he walked down the street to where Alison had directed him. He had invited all the nations he cared to ask to come to his house for a "party". He chuckled as he imagined the look on America's face when he scared him senseless in front of all the other nations. When everyone (who matters) sees Alfred acting like the little scaredy-cat I know he is, then it won't matter if he does share the video. I'll still win.

Arthur had decided on conjuring up a real ghost or a specter of some kind and had heard through the grapevine that Madam Ceridwen Irfon was the person to see about that. According to the source he'd used, her magic always worked, whether it was curses, potions, or good fortune spells. Scotland claimed it was how he managed to get a certain prime minister into office.

Arthur stopped at the corner of the street. He was lost again. This doesn't make sense; I'm exactly where that Alison told me to go, he mused. When he'd called the number Scotland had given him, he'd gotten the address from Madam Irfon herself. I followed the directions exactly, so why can't I find the bloody place? Normally, he wouldn't panic, but the sun was setting, and if he lost daylight, he'd never find this address.

Arthur felt a pair of eyes staring at him and whirled to his right. An attractive, petite young woman, who looked about 19, sat on a large, overturned basket in an alley watching him. She almost blended into the shadows in her long-sleeved, black mini-dress, black tights, and black suede knee-high boots. Her hands, clothed in black gloves, were almost hidden as well; only her pale wrists were exposed. Her jet-black hair was bobbed and framed her face. Even in the dimming light, Arthur could see her eyes almost seemed more yellow-green than green. He found himself unable to look away. He couldn't recall ever seeing a person with eyes like that.

"Arthur Kirkland?" the girl asked as she hopped down from the basket.

"Y-y-yes?"

"I'm Seren. Mistress Irfon sent me to fetch you," the young woman said.

"Are you her assistant?" Arthur asked.

"Mmmm. I guess you could call me that," she said with a smile. "Come along now." She turned and walked down the alley.

"Excuse me. I think the address Madam Irfon gave me is on a street," Arthur said. "How do you propose to get there by going through an alley?"

"Those directions are only to get you to this spot," Seren said. "That address doesn't exist."

Arthur glanced at the sheet of paper and then at the numbers on the buildings. Bollocks. She's right, he thought. No wonder I've been unable to get any help locating it.

"Come," Seren said, scurrying down the alley. "Keep up, or you'll get lost again."

He hurried to catch up to her.

At the end of the alley was a meter-high wall. She nimbly hopped up on it and walked along it. She stopped when Arthur paused. "Come on," she said. "It's wide enough that you won't fall."

Arthur reluctantly climbed up on the wall and walked behind her. She locked her hands behind her back, her hips swaying back and forth as she sauntered down it. Arthur couldn't place it, but her walk reminded him of something. He also noticed for the first time that her feet didn't make a normal footfall sound, only a light "pad, pad, pad" as she walked along the wall. Must be the boots, he thought.

Seren hopped down from the wall and looked back at Arthur. She waited until he reached her and had jumped down from the wall as well. "This way, Arthur," she said, crossing the street.

Arthur looked at where she was headed and again he stopped, unsure he wanted to continue. Seren practically danced into the church graveyard without even looking back. How can someone be that inhumanly lithe and agile? Arthur wondered as she almost looked like she was floating between the headstones. He felt a little uneasy going through a graveyard this close to evening.

"Hurry, I can't leave you behind," she said, leaning against a headstone as she waited for him.

Arthur hurried across the street and stayed right behind her. They reached the other side of the graveyard quickly. Seren walked down the pavement, staying in pace with Arthur this time. Then after looking both ways, she crossed the street and walked through another gate.

Arthur quickly crossed the street. Once he reached the gate, however, he froze in place.

Seren had led him to a stone circle.

There were 12 stones surrounding 4 stones, one of them larger and table-like. She calmly walked to the center of the circle and spryly hopped up on the largest stone. She sat down on it, tucking one leg under herself and letting the other drape over the stone. She help up a hand, palm down, and beckoned to Arthur in a way he'd seen Kiku motion to him to call him over.

"You have to go through the circle in order to get to my mistress's abode," she said.

"I think I'd rather go around it," he said.

"Why?" Seren asked, smiling.

Something behind one of the outside stones cackled.

Arthur didn't dare move; whatever was over there wasn't like his friends. Where the bloody hell are they when I need them anyway? he wondered.

"Tsk. That's just a hobgoblin," Arthur heard over his shoulder. He looked up to see a fairy in a red dress hovering above him and let out a sigh of relief.

"I'll get rid of it," she said as she flew over to the stone and chased something black away from the circle.

"Humph. You're no fun," Seren said to the fairy.

The fairy stuck her tongue out at her. "England is my friend," she said. "I won't have you playing tricks on him."

Seren's mouth dropped open. "I wasn't tricking him!" she said. "I merely wanted to see how he handled that goblin. It's a test to see if he can handle the magic Mistress will give him."

"And?" the fairy asked.

"Getting help from Fae doesn't tell me anything," Seren said, getting up from the stone. "But I have another way of testing him." She walked over to Arthur, scooped up his hands, and looked into his eyes. "Come Arthur," she said, her voice sounding almost unearthly.

Mystified, Arthur allowed himself to be led into the circle by the girl despite the fairy shouting for him to be careful. Seren led him up to the middle stones. He found himself feeling a little dizzy. It was twilight now, and he could barely make out her yellow-green eyes.

She hopped back up on the center stone and cupped his face in her hands. "What do you see, Arthur?" Seren asked.

Arthur shook his head slightly as he tried to focus. Seren suddenly looked very different. It took him a moment to recover from the shock. "I see a black cat with a white star shape on her forehead and yellow-green eyes," he said, staring at Seren.

She smiled. "Very good," she said. She leaned over and pecked him on the lips.

Arthur felt his legs give out beneath him, and he fell to the ground. He propped himself up and looked up at Seren, and his perception of her morphed back into a young woman. "What did you . . . ?" Arthur asked, suddenly feeling woozy.

Seren hopped off the stone table and crouched over him, pushing him onto his back and into the slightly dew-damped grass. For some reason, Arthur didn't feel frightened even though this situation should have warranted such a response. Seren kissed Arthur full on the mouth. His limbs felt numb and then they and his cheeks started to tingle.

"Arthur!" he heard the fairy scream as he lost consciousness.

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A/N

Fae = another name for fairies and the like
Seren = Welsh name for "star"
Cats are sometimes called "witch's assistants".

Sorry about the non-con/dub-con kissing between Arthur/England and my OC, Seren; I promise I have a really good reason for it in the story (part of which will be revealed in the next chapter). I also promise that from here on out, the other nations (canon) will be taking center stage (and kissing … uh-huh you read right).

If you liked what you read, please let me know. If you have some concrit for me, please let me know as well. If you didn't like what you read, thank you for taking the time to read this far.